Ultimate Adaptability

Love is a Place (mine is in mountains)

    The title of this post is partially borrowed from a poem by E.E. Cummings.  This poem comes close to encapsulating the depth of an experience I had recently which I already feel has re-shaped me and I desperately needed a good re-shaping.  It has been a very hard year in many respects.  There has been loss, heartache, disappointment, illness, shock, pain etc. etc.  All the things that make for a big life blow, the kind that knocks people down and makes them reluctant to get up again.  I desperately needed to find myself and I instinctively knew exactly where I needed to go... into the mountains.  I sign up for a two week ski training camp, organized by members of the Canadian Ski Instructors Alliance, in Zermatt Switzerland.  

A Deep Breath of Mountain Air

    This afternoon I went for a walk through the streets of Zermatt.  It was dusk and a light rain had started to fall but the temperature was mild enough for a light jacket.  My head was full of ski teaching as I had spent the entire day in the indoor portion of my C.S.I.A. level 3 course talking about the biomechanics of advanced level ski technique and it's relationship to our teaching method.  

Keeping Focus

Mindfulness is the art of remaining at all times aware of what's going on inside and outside ones self in the present moment.  With out this daily contemplation on what is happening in the now it is easy to get overly hung up on things that don't really matter in the big scheme of things.  Good examples of the consequences associated with loosing mindful awareness of the present moment are dwelling on the past or fantasizing about the future.  

Becoming a Teetotaler in Dublin

"Your not...? What!"  That is the typical response I have been getting lately when I have explained my decision to give up all alcohol for at least three months.  Their shock is warranted.  Up until I made the decision to quit drinking I was a huge fan of Dublin's night life scene and a great lover of fine wine.  I am eleven weeks into this experiment, one week shy of making my goal.  

I had tried to simply cut back to what would be a healthier level of alcohol consumption while still moving in the same social circles.  I quickly realized in this attempt how entrenched alcohol consumption had become in nearly every aspect of my socialization be it with friends, co-workers, or new acquaintances.  

I am a person who needs quality time with friends on a regular basis, I love dressing up and dancing the night away, I enjoying excellent culinary experiences at nice restaurants.  At first I couldn't imagine it being possible to enjoy all these things as much without that cool cocktail or gorgeous glass of  Malbec.  So why do it?    

A New Healthy Obsession

I had the opportunity to try surfing at Inchydoney Beach in West Cork a couple weeks ago and it was love at first try.  Whenever I can manage to reduce reality down to timing, coordination, and balance I am a happy girl.  The sensation of being propelled by the force of a wave is unlike anything else I have experienced, it's absolutely thrilling.  I hope to get back south in a couple weeks to try it again waves permitting.  

   In other news I realize I haven't posted in ages.  This has been intentional.  I have been taking some much needed time away from everything to change old habits.  I am in the midst of a major lifestyle redesign and the moment and it's a fragile process requiring great discipline and concentration.  I am as curious as you to see what my next instantiation will be.  All I know so far is that it involves a serious commitment to optimal nutrition and multiple forms of intense physical exertion.  

  

Sunburnt in the UK

It's true, this past weekend my husband and I spent a lovely four days in the UK during a record heat wave. In the picturesque town of Canterbury we enjoyed relaxing activities like punting down the river and lying on the grass in bloom heavy gardens soaking up the sun.  In London we got into the hustle and bustle of places like the Theatre district and Camden Town market.  Like all things good, however, there was an ordeal to get through before the fun could start.  

Fantastic Success Followed By Disastrous Failure

As promised in an earlier post about my new Christine 09 lifestyle I am going to publish my Nutritional Report but with some reservations.  It turns out that the first four days I was tracking I was almost perfectly on target.  I even exceeded my goal of acquiring over 75% of my daily required Vitamins and Minerals pre-supplement.  Please feel free to admire the beautiful percentages.

A Recipe For Disaster

Medicating out the pain of life is no way to live.  I know this because I have been there and now I am watching someone I love very much go down that same path.  It’s desperately frightening to see this happen and my best efforts at offering counsel have fallen on deaf ears.  Allow me to elaborate on why I feel I have serious reason to worry.  

I spent the majority of my 20’s in a strange state of medicated emotional deprivation.  Name a SSRI commonly prescribed between 1997 and 2006 and I was probably on it at some point.  But that was nothing.  After years of being on mood altering medication secondary side effects emerged that looked very much like serious mental illness and I was promptly prescribed yet more drugs, anti-psychotics and benzodiazepines, to be taken in conjunction with the preexisting SSRI prescription.  

It was a  strange cocktail of substances designed to perk me up in the morning and put me to bed at night not unlike the regime of hardened street drug addicts.  I noticed my pharmacist on more than one occasion furrowing his brow with confusion at the various drug combinations.  I was told the reasoning behind it by my Psychiatrist but it didn’t matter, I had come to like the idea that I could delegate the messy business of straightening out what was wrong with my life to a handful of little pills.   

The 20’s are a point in your life where you are struggling to find your personal identity, determine what you want from life, and start laying the foundation for how you are going to get it.  On mood altering medication your perception of the world around you is altered along with it your response to stimuli, your reflections, and even the content of your dreams.  

It is unrealistic to think that you could alter all of the above without changing the fundamental characteristics of your personality. It’s daft to think you can make sound decisions about how to proceed in life when you are experiencing a drug altered reality.  Make no mistake, the consequences of the bad decisions you will make in this drug induced fog are by no means softened because the method of delivery, a neat little bottles with a PHD’s name printed across a crisp white label.    

Today Launching Christine 09

My greatest success ever when it comes to adhering to a diet and exercise regimen was achieved after a great life crisis.  It was four years ago now that my life exploded and in the aftermath I made a commitment to a diet called Caloric Restriction with Optimal Nutrition  and stuck with it for about 10 months.  During that time I learned a lot about nutrition and how my body responds to subtle adjustments in my diet thanks to a phenomenal piece of software called CRON-O-Meter.  Today my CRON practice has long since eroded down to what I would consider a healthier than average diet 70% of the time from which I routinely depart and indulge shamelessly about 30% of the time.  

A Legacy To Be Proud Of

Today I hosted a Ukranian Egg Painting party for seven of my lady friends.  I learned to paint Ukranian Eggs, called Pysanky, from my maternal Grandmother.  I can remember watching my grandma sit with what looked to me to be super human patience slowly tracing out an intricate pattern on the rounded surface of a tiny egg.  I remember attending an egg painting party at my Aunts house which was the first time I can remember receiving instruction from my Grandmother on how to paint Pysanky and the frustration involved.  Like most things its not as easy as it looks.

Today sitting around a table of friends chatting about all manner of things as women do when we get together I couldn't help but think that my Grandmother would have enjoyed seeing her legacy in action. 

 

Carol Hansen liked to master things.  She was an excellent cook and talked a lot about her cooking process.  She would relay with excitement her discoveries of techniques that worked well, and with humor techniques that fell flat.  She was also very good at Painting Pysanky often spending months working on a single egg until it was perfect.  

However, these were just a couple of the things I watched my grandmother do well.  I think the most profound skill my Grandmother mastered was her boundless compassion for all living things.  Entering my Grandma's house felt like being enveloped in a magical duvet where a cups of coco just magically appeared in front of you at precisely the moment  you most needed one.  If a bird or dog or even an ant was lucky enough to wander into my grandmother's yard it too was treated to it's species equivalent of a warm cup of coco at the precise moment it needed it.  Grandma could sense need in others and delighted in fulfilling it.